the answer, as I discovered, is simple:
Buy a box of poop in the sales 
What to do when you got too much money
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This is legit.
I've seen a pill that if you swallow it it will make your poop combined with real glittering gold. The pill is colored yellow such as gold it's made out of gold and it's just for fun does no harm. You can buy it for 55$ if you want
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